Dystopian Future

Ezra turned towards Zemin with cold eyes, colder than ever before, even if Zemin hadn't asked for what he did, he had stilled disliked it, he hated to be blackmailed.
"So it's either go on a date with you, or be killed by a vampire. How lovely of you to give me a choice" he said sarcastically. "And not only did you do that, you actually decided what this date would include, so I don't need to go through the trouble of planing it!"
If the situation had been different, or if Zemin had asked for something else, he may have thought of him as brave, but now he just hated him for it. It was true that he didn't fear that, didn't mean he longed for it either. No he actually liked being alive very much, despite everything and he hadn't worked as hard as he had to roll over and die. Even if he for a second thought about doing that, seeing it as a better option than being forced to go on a date. If Zemin had suggested only food and drinks, no contact he could have considered it, feeling more comfortable, but as it always seemed to turn out, the werewolf wanted more. The worst part with it all was that he would be all alone, because he couldn't bring any of the spirits, even if the man hadn't stated that Ezra knew that wouldn't be acceptable, so he would have no idea where he was, what was happening or what Zemin would do, could life be better? If he had believed in God he hat thought that he hated him, and wanted to torture him for something. Now he just thought life hated him. For a second he thought about saying no and actually leave town, but who said that the vampire would leave him alone because of that, and he didn't wish to be on the run and hunted, so he had fairly little choice. He knew he needed Zemin for this, and so did the werewolf and could make demands, since Ezra really couldn't say no. He had no one else to turn to, and he couldn't do it alone. There was only one logical answer, the one he hated and not wished for, but what could he do? He wondered for a second if the man thought that forcing him into a situation like that would make him like him more? Because Ezra had just gone from not caring, or at least not trying to care about the man to hate him.

"Well there is no need for me to answer is it? You haven't given me much of a choice, so let's go on a date, kill the vampire and then walk our separated ways forever!" Ezra said with a cold voice, wondering if the wolf was proud of himself? If he felt joy for doing this to him? And because of that, he actually considered of leaving Zemin when they got to the vampire, it wouldn't result in the vampires death, but he would at least enjoy seeing how the wolf was being torned to pieces!

Zemin could sense, without any doubt, that Ezra really hated him. Not like he’d thought he’d done before, no. This time it felt like real, strong hate and not just a gust of the freezing wind. Strangely enough, it didn’t seem to affect the werewolf that much and all he could focus on was the bubbling feeling in his stomach.
“Then it’s decided”, he said and smiled widely, not being able to contain how pleased he was. It didn’t matter how much the shaman hated him in that moment - he’d make sure to change that one way or another.
“And to be completely fair you could’ve just said no. That’s what I figured you’d do”, the wolf admitted and shrugged his shoulders. “It’s nothing much, Ezra..but this is literally the only chance for me to even try to get to know you..maybe even become friends with you? Because you don’t trust me and would never agree to something like that, so I’m sorry for taking the only chance I’ve got”, Zemin explained, even though it didn’t justify any of his actions. But in the end he was desperate, extremely desperate. This was the best chance he’d ever get, so he wasn’t planning on letting it pass.

All he wanted was to get closer to Ezra, however this was more like forcing them to become closer. And that, that wasn’t right. How did you even think when you put that request into real words, huh? He hates you more than ever now! Stupid, stupid, stupid.
“Ezra..” Zemin quietly whispered after the silence had fallen over the room, making everything eerily quiet. “I want to rephrase my request”, he slowly continued and looked down upon his bare feet, wiggling with his toes as he tried to find the correct words. “I don't want to force you so..if there’s even a tiny part of you that likes me, a single aspect that you care about..then please go out with me?”
It still wasn’t good, but at least a lot better. Now the other man had a choice and he wouldn’t be forced to do something if he absolutely didn’t want to. This was better. Not for Zemin himself, but for Ezra. The werewolf wanted to be more thoughtful, and with that wish came the correction of his stupid actions.

Ezra could tell that the man was really pleased by this, and that almost wanted Ezra to kill him at the spot, not caring that he needed him to take down the fucking vampire. For a second he even thought of killing himself, just to remove the smile that most likely was showing on the other mans face, and to hinder the vampires plans, that thought made him smile coldly, even if he knew that wasn't the way he would go, ever.
"When you blackmail someone to do what you want, the option to say no isn't there" Ezra stated. Of course he would have said no if he could! And that Zemin thought he would say no, well that even proved how much he had forced Ezra to say yes! "Is that how you build all of your friendships, forcing people to become your friend? I am no expert, but I am fairly sure that's step one, don't force anyone to be your friend"
It was true that he wasn't an expert, but he had managed to befriends the spirits he had, compared to most shamans who just used them, he actually knew his spirits. He trusted them and they trusted him, but that would never have worked if he forced himself on them. And only chance? Ezra could almost laugh, well at this point it most likely was, before he thought of becoming friends with the brothers, it would happen slow as fuck, but he would most likely have tried. But Zemin destroyed the chance of that ever happening, and now, well he didn't make it better. Like he would suddenly become his friend because he forced him to hangout with him, Ezra was more than sure it would have the opposite effect on him.

As Zemin continued speaking he wondered what else he would force him to do? But he heard that the voice was different, and Ezra wondered why? What was the man planning? Did he thought that speaking kindly to him would change the situation, suddenly making him eager to do on a date with him? He didn't think of Zemin as stupid, but if that was his plan, maybe he had to rethink that. But when he continued speaking all Ezra could do was blink in surprise. What on earth was the man thinking? First forcing him, then trying to take it back an be nice instead? Like that would change his mind! Wow he wanted to do nothing more than say no to the man! However he wondered if he would have said yes if the man asked like that the first time, most likely not, but he would not hate Zemin at least, making a huge difference. So what did the wolf think? That the idea of a date would sound more appealing in his ears if he wasn't forced into it? Okay well he had to admit it did because he wasn't forced, didn't mean he liked the idea anymore, but having a choice was better. However he didn't know what to answer, before everything he had cared to some extent, but now? Okay he knew he wasn't totally unaffected by the man, being worried earlier, but it didn't make the thought of an date any more appealing.
"I don't know what you want me to answer Zemin. The thought of an date doesn't sound appealing at all to me, not being effected by the fact who I went with." he started, knowing his answer would be no whoever asked him out, especially if he didn't feel comfortable, he wondered if he could ever get to the level with someone where he would trust that person blindly and just go with them? But at the same time he realised that he had yet to say no to the other man, words that should have been uttered a long time ago, he sighed, why didn't he just say no to Zemin, or kill him? "You know I think going on a date with me is actually the worst way to get to know me, because I would never be comfortable enough to let anyone close. I even think you have a bigger chance of getting to know me here, like this.If you hadn't acted the way you did almost two weeks ago, I would most likely have gotten closer to you, most likely slower than you preferred, but enough to make me comfortable, but now? Well the thought of doing that isn't one that I find to my liking, just like I don't find the idea of going on a date appealing, so if you are giving me an option, I will tell you no" He wondered why he even explained it to the other, he hadn't made himself worthy of an explanation, but maybe he wished to do it so the man wouldn't go back to forcing him.

The answer came to no surprise whatsoever and all Zemin could do was to accept the words. But it hurt, it hurt him really fucking bad. If he was to compare it with anything, he’d say that it felt as if he’d been hit right in the ribs. So everything as based on what had happened those weeks ago? When the werewolf had been both in heat and totally out of control. Of course he did, what else would someone like Ezra do? Good question.
“I am giving you an option, yes, and I understand that you’re saying no to my suggestion”, he mumbled and stated wiping away the tears that had come as an unavoidable order. Just as they’d done so many times before, they started rolling down the pale, yet rosy, cheeks. Soon they travelled even further, over the edge of the chin and down towards the rug. As soon as the tears hit the rug, they seemed to disappear and leave the surface of the earth. Ezra hates you, he actually hates you so fucking much! This is all your fault, you stupid ass. All your fault. Not his, not Xues, not Riviks, it’s only your fault. Get it? You can’t blame anyone else except yourself. The amber eyes overflowed with even more tears, which were immediately wiped away.
”You hate me because of that one thing? I guess it’s okay..I can’t really do anything about it now, can I?” Zemin whispered with a shaky, unstable voice. After saying those words he dug both hands down in their respective pockets, before he spun around on the spot and walked straight out the door. The tears had finally managed to overflow and he couldn’t keep them under control any longer. As a matter of fact, he wasn’t even sure if he could control any part of himself. Everything just hurt, it hurt so goddam bad. But at the same time he kind of understood how the shaman felt, as he’d probably had the same, painful feeling when Zemin had touched him. Even if it just was a small stroke of his hair, even if the words had been just words. In the end they were the same and it was a fact that they could hurt equally as bad.

After walking up all the stairs, after crying his eyes out multiple times and tripping over his own feet - he reached the landing. There he fell face down on the floor, breaking his nose together with a couple of the ribs. However he didn’t care any longer. Zemin had decided on helping Ezra with the whole vampire ordeal, but after that he was just going to vanish. He and Xue would travel to the mountains and live out the rest of their days as animals. Eventually they’d lose their humanity and that’s when everything was going to become peaceful. And if Xue didn’t want to come, he’d simply go alone. One train ticket couldn’t be that expensive?
The werewolf let out a sigh, still sobbing quietly where he laid on the dirty floor. Fuck, he couldn’t move any of his limbs. Not even his fingers or toes! A broken nose and a couple of shattered ribs wouldn’t kill him, right? Hopefully not, as he didn’t have a death wish just yet. Or did he? To be honest he wasn’t sure any longer.
No, you can’t think like that! Stop it! Xue needs you and you can’t just leave him all alone in this evil, wicked world. You’re not going to die, stop being dramatic. So what if Ezra hates you? You’ll find someone else to love and care for eventually. He’s just a hopeless case, so let him go. Stop caring so goddam much!

"I didn't hate you because of what you did back then, I was pissed at you because you didn't care how I felt or how hard it was for me, and I got reminded of why I shouldn't trust anyone, but hate? No, that came with your attempt to try to force me to go on a date with me" he said honestly, even if the hate was a bit harder to feel when the man had asked nicely, no he rather despised him instead. But he could almost laugh at the fact that if those two things hadn't happened, he could have gotten closer to the wolf over time, just like he had done with Rivik. But the man didn't want to give him time, not then, not now. It often felt like he wanted Ezra to change and give him everything at once, like the past didn't mattered. Like it was a small thing he could get over without any struggle. It wasn't like Ezra worked to get over it, no he worked to be functional, and to live his own life, away from everything. But he admitted it was a struggle to do so this time. If it was because he had to work through it a second time, or because the ma had showed him something he had never had, only for a short second, he didn't now.
"And I don't know if you can do anything about it Zemin. Normally I am not a hating person, or I kill those I hate and the feeling disappears because they are no more. All this is different" Why on earth was he so honest with the other man? It was like after seeing that neither of the brothers hadn't judge him for who he was, and being honest with him, he started being honest as well, and he hated it, because he felt like Zemin didn't deserved that. He didn't deserved to get to know him more, yet he said things more honestly than he intended to do.

When he heard how Zemin started crying, he couldn't help himself, he felt bad for the man, another thing he hated. The wolf wasn't one of the spirits who were close to him, who he cared about, wishing for them to be happy. No Zemin was a person, almost a total stranger one that had showed Ezra that he was better off alone, but despite that he felt bad hearing him cry. Not that he tried to make him feel better, or stopped him when he left. Because even if Zemin had been a close friend, he was no good at comforting someone, and he felt like he would make it worse trying to do so. When he heard how the man closed the door he summoned the spirits.

"Are you alright?" Rivik walked over and Ezra took control of his eyes.
"I am alright"
"Where is Zemin?" Jax wondered and when Rivik turned towards the wolf he could see signs of a fight, and he guessed Rivik wasn't looking better.
"At his room, crying" Ezra had barely time to utter the words before Jax rushed towards the man.
"You can almost believe he belongs to him and not you" Rivik placed himself in his bed, and Ezra jumped down from the counter to drink some more tea, trying to ignore the worrying feeling he felt for Zemin, telling himself he didn't deserve that.

When Jax rushed through the open door, Zemin could literally feel his heart sinking. Eventually it hit rock bottom and the man carefully shook his head, crawling into a sitting position. His ribs hurt like crazy, making it difficult to breathe and the nose was a waterfall of blood. A small puddle immediately started forming underneath the werewolf, when he finally sat up.
“Your fur will become a bloody mess, Jax”, he mumbled and coughed, which only resulted in even more blood being thrown up. Had he accidentally fractured something internally? Except from the ribs, so to say? It wasn’t as he fell face down onto the floor often, so he couldn’t exactly tell.
Zemin turned away from the white wolf and made a laughable attempt to standing up. Long story short - it didn’t work. He fell back towards the hard surface, hit his back leaving him unable to move. The amber eyes stared at the ceiling and the breaths slowly, but surely, become shorter and shorter. He’d punctured his lung, hadn’t he? What a great surprise. That basically meant that he had no other choice but shifting, or the wounds would only keep worsening. Like he said before, he didn’t have a death wish just yet.
“I’m sorry but can you be decent and look away or something? You already know I-I’m not a fan of turning in front of other”, Zemin stuttered. Shortly thereafter the spirit nodded and turned his back to the werewolf, who somehow managed to pull himself up into a sitting position once again. He carefully pulled the sweater over his head and took off the black jeans, throwing them both further in the attic.

Turning always hurt to some extent but this, this was going to be more painful than anything he’d ever felt before. But he knew he had to, as it’d end up healing him.
“Just so y-you know, I-I’m not dying o-or anything”, he said, with quite some difficulty, and looked straight at Jax. “Go, i don’t want you to see this”, he continued. It took a while for the spirit to oblige, but eventually he did. Maybe he was going to get Ezra out of fear, who knew?
Zemin whispered a short prayer before the slim shoulders sunk together. Then the crackling of the bones came, followed by a very irritating cough. The puddle of blood only grew larger and larger as the transformation progressed, leaving the man in nothing more than horrible pain. This type of turning was different, more painful and agonising. It didn’t really involve the body to form itself into something different, but rather fully eliminating the human body and allowing the wolf to basically explode out. Instead of the fingernails reshaping themselves into claws, the claws pushed their way out from the knuckles. The fur didn’t grow out from the skin, but rather emerged from under the skin. It basically ripped apart, raining down upon the floor in pieces. By that point, right when the dark brown eyes fell out from their sockets, Zemin let out the most gut wrenching scream. It was loud, clear and filled with agony. If he’d known it would be this painful, he’d rather died on the spot.

Ezra heard Jax coming rushing back before he saw him.
"Didn't he want your company?" Rivik asked but Jax ignored him and rushed towards Ezra almost starting to drag him along.
"Zemin is hurt, real bad!" Jax said as well as he could as he tried to get Ezra to move, but the shaman wouldn't budge. At first he couldn't really understand how the wolf had gotten hurt, sure he heard him fall, but how badly could he really fall?
"So? We aren't his mother, he will manage on his own" Rivik answered resolving in Jax growling towards the fox. It was surprising how well the spirit had taken towards the brothers, but maybe it actually mattered that they all were wolves, or it was because Jax's was more polite and liking towards stranger than Ezra and Rivik was. Maybe that was how Jax would be towards everyone if the Shaman met more people.
"Ezra come on" the wolf tried, still being unable to make the Shaman to move.
"Even if he is hurt, I am no healer, you know that Jax!" Ezra tried, not wishing to snapp at the wolf.
"Then use a potion, I know they can help him!" well Jax wasn't wrong, even if the potions seemed to hurt the wolf, it had helped him, but did he really need that, just from a fall?
"Why would we waste a potion on him?"
"Enough, both of you!" Ezra started fearing this would become a common thing, the spirits arguing over Zemin, and he had no interest in hearing it, struggling with how he himself felt was more than enough.

He could tell that Rivik was about to answer him when they all heard a scream, and it actually made Ezra worried.
"Lets go!" the scream had made it impossible for him not to at least check on the other man. Jax rushed past him, wishing to get back to the man as Ezra looked at Rivik, knowing he needed his help.
"Fine" the fox muttered as they started walking, climbing the stairs, starting with picking up the potion from the floor above them before they continued walking towards the attic.

When they got there Jax was really worried, but he couldn't do anything so all he did was sitt down and whimper. Even Rivik felt silence seeing the wolf in front of them and Ezra had no idea what to do, feeling like the potion wouldn't even help the man. But he soon collected himself, to some extent, knowing he couldn't help Zemin by staring at him.
"Can I help you somehow Zemin?" he asked instead, hoping the wolf could tell him where to start at least, if he even could help him, for a second he wished Xue was there, maybe the other wolf would know what the fuck was going on.

Why did they all have to come? Zemin froze on the spot, before slowly lowering his hands only to reveal the human eyes in one of the palms. Can I help you some how? The words echoed through the werewolf’s head a couple of times, before he bit down on his tongue while shaking his head.
“N-no!” He exclaimed, even though it sounded more like a growl. “I’m just t-trying to get r-rid of this s-stupid human s-skin”, he continued, stuttering throughout the entire sentence as the skin across his back ripped even further apart, revealing the thick, dark fur underneath.
After gathering all of his strength, he managed to turn his back to the small group containing the two spirits and shaman. He didn't want any of them to witness something so disgusting and gross. As if the normal transformations weren’t bad enough! Zemin turned his head to cast a quick glance towards the shaman, hindering himself in the last second as the skin across the face started pulling apart. It was almost as if he was puking up his wolf form, or maybe stepping out of his human form?
The nose started forcing its way out as the teeth fell out only to be replaced by new, sharper and longer ones. Hell, it really hurt. But now that he’d gotten so far into the process, it kind of felt like a relief when the human mask slid off completely.

Zemin shook out the dark fur, allowing small pieces of flesh to fall into the ground. When he turned around, all he could do was stare. Of course he knew who the beings in front of him were, but he couldn’t understand why they were there. Hadn’t the man just rejected him or something? Wasn’t that his mate? The turn had obviously messed something up, leaving the brain in a mushy, steaming pile of mush. He immediately took a step back, only to reveal the sharp rows of teeth. At first he just stood there snarling like a scared animal, but then the growling joined in. He didn’t know what to make of either himself or the other ones. Everything was just so out of place and weird.
Almost every single ounce of humanity seemed to had just rolled right off of him, leaving only the most essential memories and thoughts. He knew his own name and he knew their names. That was a great start! Knowing your own name and the name of your mate. Jesus fucking Christ.
Confusion, deep, lingering confusion. Of course this amnesia wouldn’t stay forever, but it would probably take a few days before the little wolf started returning to his human ways. In a sense that was probably a good thing, considering the current situation with Ezra. On that note; he should do this way more often, as it proved to be very effective. Genious! Even though it really wasn’t.

Ezra gave him a skeptical look, but didn't protest. If the man stated that he didn't need help, he couldn't do anything, besides watch. He couldn't tell why this transformation was different, unsure of what triggered it the difference. Was it that the man were in pain? Or was it because he was emotional unstable? Ezra really didn't know anything about werewolves and he almost cursed the writers for not being able to give him more information in the books. He knew that the wolves were rare, but people should be able to tell him something! But nope, he had to learn by watching or listening to what the brothers said. However when he was thrown into situations like this, he felt helpless. Ezra looked at the sprits but they didn't seem to know this time either, and Ezra hindered himself from signing, being forced to only watch. Even if he was far from pleased with the man at the moment, he didn't wish to see him like that. Pain was something he rarely wished up on someone, knowing all to well how it could break you, and how much you needed to endure before you didn't felt it anymore, and he hoped that would never happen to the wolf. Okay he didn't wish for him to feel pain, but being through enough for it to never hurt again, then he rather saw Zemin in pain.

However when the wolf took a step back and started growling towards them, Rivik did the same and placed himself between Zemin and Ezra. The shaman smiled, glad that the fox was willing to protect him, even if he didn't know why Zemin did it. It felt like a strange thing to do, if he didn't wish for them to stay, he could just say so. Jax was more relaxed, but on his guards, even if he liked Zemin he was prepared to protect Ezra if it was needed. Ezra on the other hand sighed, hating that he cared when he saw the wolf like that. He wished he could walkout through the door without caring, leaving the wolf to whatever was going on, but he hadn't moved at all. Instead he actually sat down so he could be on the wolf's eyelevel, still with Rivik between then.
"Zemin are you alright?" he slowly asked, a stupid question really since it didn't seemed like the wolf was okay, but he didn't know what else to ask.

In the middle of all the confusion, Zemin did understand one thing - that neither the man or the spirits were out to get him. So why on earth was he both snarling and growling, acting as if they posed any kind of threat towards him? Stupid, mushy brain, why did you forget so many basic things all of a sudden?
With that single thought, the wolf backed down. The ears plopped back up on the head, the tail wasn’t tucked in between his legs and the sharp teeth were hidden. For a short moment he exceeded to making sure he actually was okay, carefully observing the slim body as well as he could. There wasn’t a single visible injury and the breathing had returned back to normal. And none of the ribs seemed fractured or even bruised. Well, at least something had worked out right.
Zemin sent a quick look towards the shaman, unsure of what to do next. Wasn’t that a bit odd though? That the man had squatted down and spoken to him? He wasn’t fully able to grasp any of the words, but the tone of the voice was nice. Very nice, almost as lean and smooth as honey.

Wait, what the fuck was he going on about? That was a human, or something that looked like one. And humans were scary, really scary, except when they weren’t. Fuck, how has his brain even managed to turn into this useless pile? The werewolf frowned and closed his eyes lids for a couple of seconds, while taking deep breath. Right in that moment, all he wanted was to cuddle up next to Ezra and fall asleep. Because the mans scent was calming and well, a mate was a mate. It was impossible for the little, confused wolf to not want just that.
Therefore he took some weary, slow steps towards the shaman. He cast a hasty glance towards the spirit, making sure to walk as far away from him as possible. The memory of the scratch mark still lingered somewhere deep down, and he had no intentions of getting another one.
When he reached his target, all he did was to make himself comfortable right at his feet, closely in front of him. Of course there was no actual contact involved, but it was close enough. If Ezra wanted to pet him or whatever, he should do so by his own accord.